You know it is Christmas week when...

There is a one car roll over...

There is a suicide attempt...

You get the post Christmas meal syncope call...

You open your work e-mail to find complaints about grades...

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Who Needs a Locksmith?

You get to your car and the key won't work in any of the doors. It is after 3am and you've been "out" with some friends, but none of them are around. In fact it is awfully quiet in this sleepy little village you are in.

What to do? You are a fairly intelligent person, and you realize that the key's close friend is the brick (they share the common denominator of both having atoms...). With some skill you break the driver's side window. You climb in, light a cigarette, and get ready to head home... What luck! Now your key won't work in the ignition either. You are NOT the kind of person who likes wasted time or motion. How might one make the best use of this time? You got it, take a nap!

Enter police and EMS.

Note: Turns out the guy was in the WRONG CAR.

Good thing the key didn't work, eh?

What a Pick Up Line

According to my wife, our five year old daughter was invited over to a friend's house for a play date. The friend, who is also five and refers to my daughter as his "girlfriend", reportedly stated that if my daughter should come over they would be able to make full use of "the hot tub on the roof".

I will have to have a conversation with the young Casanova regarding the odds of ANYONE spending alone time with my daughter before she is 40, never mind someone who thinks the way to make it happen is to mention a roof mounted hot tub...

DJ

Are they "students" too?

It's Friday and the last day of classes for the Fall of 2006. YEAH!

ESPN2 is currently showing a NCAA Iaa football semi-final between Montana and U-Mass. Note that this isn't Ia which everyone admits (behind closed doors) is basically semi-pro ball with teams associated with schools in a very loose fashion (separate dorms, eating areas, admissions criteria, etc.). No, this is the next tier down, where one might hope college students get to play some football vs. football players getting to attend some college.

Anyone want to make bets on:

1) The extent to which players on either team have majors that mirror the student body as a whole?

2) The GPAs for either team relative to their respective classmates?

3) The SAT's, High School Class Rank, High School course selection or High School GPAs for the football teams matching the student bodies as a whole?

The good news? The Iaa system has a playoff, instead of the money driven BCS system that bastardizes the Ia system.

The Grumpy DJ who has lost 2 days the last two weeks to athletics related meetings, reminding me how political this whole system is...


P.S. My apologies to Montana and U-Mass players who actually have a real academic experience and are worthy of attending your schools. I know you exist, but you must admit you are a minority.