Saturday, August 6

It's August - Do you know where your 30's went?

EMS has been relatively quiet. Had a patient with a history of brain cancer and stroke develop sudden onset stroke symptoms on her previously un-affected side. I did the best I could with her but she looked scared (she was non-verbal) and I felt helpless. We all roll the dice each day we wake up, but some people just end up rolling "craps" more than others, and this poor woman has been getting more than her fair share of bad rolls.

I just finished teaching a 5 week class that met four times per week, two hours per class meeting. Well, actually, "finished" is a bit optimistic given I have to grade the last quiz, the final exam and the paper. Between this class and having a research student around this summer, it hasn't felt like summer much. Like my peers, summer is usually reserved for research and writing, which can be done on your own time, allowing for a much more relaxed pace as compared to the school year. This summer has been very "scheduled" and I am not feeling relaxed and re-charged for the school year.

A complicating factor in this, perhaps, is that I turn 40 at the end of this month. FOURTY. It cracks me up that my wife has an easier time with these landmark birthdays than I do, but the fact is that I hated 30 and I am not looking forward to 40. Don't get me wrong; Life is GOOD. I don't want for much (and I have all my basic needs filled), I'm happily married, have two wonderful children who are healthy and happy, and for reasons that still confuse me my employer thinks I am of use. I'm not in the "buy a Corvette and get a honey" way, but I am realizing 40 is NOT 30, and it sure as hell isn't the 18 to 22 my students are, if you know what I mean.